Worst Videogame Movies

While watching a really bad movie last night a thought entered my head has there ever been a really good videogame movie and that answer to that question is no, so that must mean that any game that is turned into a movie can only be bad however there are levels of bad and the following 5 movies not only scrape the bottom of the barrel but they dig so far down they hit the middle of the earth and cause a earthquake of crap so big the whole world is obliterated.

5. House of the Dead - Uwe Boll is known to be the master of crap when it comes to movies and most of his crap is based on videogames and if you watch this you will see why.
Trying to take a first person shooter and turning it into a movie can be a hard thing however when you give Uwe Boll the chance to shine you get a movie that is so bad you'd rather player the game itself blindfolded while getting your nuts trampled on by a horny elephant.

4. Bloodrayne -  The second of Mr Boll's films in the top 5 and by far his worst one as not only did he choose a really bad game he made a movie that turned out to be even worse than the game itself.
What was on display over the 90 minute running time was reel after reel of pure crap as it showed that the director not only didn't play the game he hadn't a clue on what he was doing as the movie made no sense at all.

3. Dead or Alive (DOA) - This was the movie that made me come up with this list as i have just watched it and i couldn't believe how terrible it turned out to be.
I heard that it was bad however it was one of those times that you had to see it for yourself to see how bad it really is and i can 100% say that this not only deserves to be at number 3 in my list but it should also be put in a crap movie vault and dropped out at sea so nobody has to witness it ever again.

2. Double Dragon - This is the oldest videogame movie on my list and one of the first videogame movies ever to be made and what a way to start.
I wasn't that much of a fan of the videogame itself so why did i even think that they would make a good movie out of it was beyond me however it turned out they didn't as they made it so child like that even a baby would be disgusted by it.
It begs to question though if this was the best they could do why would directors still think it was a good idea to make a movie out of any videogame.

1. Street Fighter the Legend of Chun Li - out of the many videogames that have been turned into movies why is this one the worst, well the simple answer to that question is that it was made when nobody wanted it and it just stands head and shoulder above the rest when it comes to terrible movies.
Like with a few of the movies on this list you have to see it to believe why this is one of the worst movies ever made, however i will give you a warning if you do watch it make sure nobody is around you because you might end off throwing your DVD player at them.

So that is my top 5 there was no room for other crap like the Super Mario Bros movie and Alone in the Dark but that doesn't mean they are not bad movies.






   

Ultimate Top 5 : Best Games Ever Part 3

So Greg had his turn and James list went up yesterday so i guess i have to chip in with my top 5 games off all time and unlike Greg and James i already had 4 games in mind it was just the 5th one that was a bitch to choose however I've picked my 5 so here goes.

Resident Evil
If you were told that a game these days is only going to be set in one solitary place you wouldn't give it a chance in hell however back in 1996 there was one game that saw you trek through a mansion full of nasties and that game was about to change the face of gaming forever.
Even though Resident Evil wasn't the first survival horror game (that went to Alone in the Dark) but it was the first one to really put survival horror games on the map.
Never before had i ever been scared by a game the way resident evil did, i only thought that kind of stuff was the canon fodder of movies but i was so wrong.
The vast mansion had surprise and new terror around every corner thus making it an experience more than a game but it's still on hell of a game and everybody should play NOW.

Final Fantasy 7
A bit of an easy choice this one as never before had i spent so much time on one game and never before had i invested so much of my life in it and I'm glad i did as i was experience not only a game but a journey so epic that it would change my gaming life forever.
As soon as the first FMV started with the train going into Midgar i knew something great was going to happen and not only was it great it was bloody brilliant.
Games back then only had a usual life of around 10 hours however Final Fantasy had to be played for more than 50 but that's if you only go through the main quest if you spent more time in it's company you would easily get 100 hours of gameplay out of it or even more and you had to spend the time with it as you wouldn't of experienced the vast world that was on offer.
Oh yeah one last thing and i know that i will get a few giggles here but i don't care, when has a game made you cry because i will admit i did have a tear in my eye when Aeris died near the end of the game and i still have never had that kind of feeling from any game since.

Mario 64
I had to choose one Mario game and it was a hard choice as the first one was the reinvention of the platform, the third game had the scope and variety and so on and so forth however it wasn't until Mario 64 came along that Mario showed what he could do as he was about to change history.
So how the hell did he do that well it was down to one thing and that was the jump to 3d, a few games had attempted this however Mario was the game that showed how it should be done.
It wasn't just the fact that this game was in 3D that made this game great it was the constant surprise that was on offer as it gave you something new to do at every turn and each new thing was an experience in itself.
You had every kind of of level type on hand from the water level to the lava one all the way down to a ice level and even though these had been seen in every other platform game it wasn't until Mario 64 came out before each kind of level could be shown in it's truest form and since then every game has tried to copy but not with the high standards that Mario 64 had.

Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time
When anybody comes up with a greatest game of all time list you know that Ocarina of Time will feature high if not at number 1 and there is a reason for this and that's down to how fantastic this game really is, if i had to put my list in any order this would easily be at number 1.
There is so much i could type about Ocarina of Time that would make this reason so big that i would need much more space but the main reason why this is the greatest game off all time is down to it being perfect in every sense.
From the fantastic graphics, down to each dungeon offering something new, to the brilliant character design and weapons on offer Ocarina of Time is genius in it's purest form.
Never had i played a game where two polar opposites would fit so well together that if done today would just be a complete mess.
Going from the simplistic nature of Link as a child with the sunshine hitting his face down to the vast green fields of Hyrule to the dark and foreboding nature of link as an adult is something of such brilliance that it still hasn't been bettered today.
If you have to go back and play a game from gaming past then this is the one to play, even though against today's standards of high quality graphics etc The Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time stands head and shoulders above anything else.

Tetris
This was one of the hardest choices i had to make as there is some many games that have impacted on me but i had to settle on one and Tetris won it by a small margin.
By taking a simple premise of fitting blocks together to make them disappear Teteris had the main thing of gaming going for it and that was fun.
I know i would spend countless hours playing it with me using the one more go line over and over again until the batteries of my Gameboy would run out but that shows you how addictive this game can be.
I doubt that back when Tetris came out that the developers would think that it would change puzzle games forever because it did as all simple puzzle games these days follows that same mechanics of fitting some kind of blocks together to make them disappear.
If Tetris has teached me one thing about gaming is that something can be simple for it to be great and this is simplicity in it's highest form.

Well that's it for my list you can check out the other two list to see what James and Greg had picked and don't forget to leave a comment on some games that you think should be named one of the greatest games of all time.

Ultimate Top 5 : Best Games Ever Part 2

Greg had his turn yesterday and surprised us with a couple of his choices so can James surprise us with any of his choices, well read on and find out.

Call of Duty 4 Modern Warfare
It's so easy to mock this choice as it hasn't been out very long so why the hell does it deserve to be named one of my favorite games of all time, well that question is simple and it's down to pure game play.
It's so easy to choose one of the other FPS games of this generation but none of them has made me keep coming back for more even though this can frustrate the hell out of me.
By taking the simple paint by numbers game play that most FPS games have and add a perk system so good like this one it shows that COD4 does deserve to be named in your chart of best games even if you don't think it does.

Micro Machine V3
Ah pure fun is really hard to find these days as developers only want to throw a shit load of polygons at you and some stupid story that you couldn't give a dam about, so why the hell have they not looked into the past to show them how funs game should be done if they did they would find Micro Machines V3.
As i keep saying this game boils down to pure fun because I've had so much since the release of this game.
I use to spend countless hours playing this with friends as we knew that it would not only past a lot of time but it would also make us smile and isn't that what games should be able to do to you.

Worms
Just like my last choice this again just boils down to pure fun and like Micro Machines i spend countless hours on this.
The thing however that makes this stand out more than the rest boils down to the customization as this has it in droves.
Unlimited levels down to the landscape generator and the brilliant selection of weapons makes this one of the greatest multiplayer games ever made.

Mario Kart DS
There is so many Mario Kart games to choose from so why the hell did i pick this one and the simple answer is again down to the multiplayer as at the time is was the best on the DS.
You take the simple elements from the Mario kart games and add in a plethora of tracks and fantastic character and you know you have a winning game however Nintendo didn't want to stop there they had to add one more element that would change any multiplayer game on DS and that is online play.
The online portion of the game wasn't just an added element it was in the end the most important element as up to 4 people could battle it out to find out who is the best Mario Kart racer and everybody started off on an even playing feel as it didn't just all boil down to who knew that tracks the most, luck also played a main part in it making it easier for anybody to play.

Sonic 2
You can forget Mario as he is just a stupid fat plumber that can barely move, Sonic on the other hand resorted to speed and that's why i had to choose at least one Sonic game.
So why did i choose this one well it's because it was the first game i had ever played and that's why it has to be in my top 5 games of all time.
Like I've said before Sonic was all about speed and going fast through the levels given was the thing that opened my eyes and made me say I'm going to enjoy my gaming experience from this day forth.
It wasn't all about the speed of the game some of the level was fantastical laid out in a way that not only made it a fun game to play but also set me a challenge to get past as the later levels were a bit hard.

That's it for James top 5 mine is the last one to posted up and that will be up sometime tomorrow .

Ultimate Top 5 : Best Games Ever

In another one of my ideas i thought i would take a countdown list and change it a little bit by making them into a ultimate top 5.

So what is an ultimate top 5 well to cut things short it's not one top 5 but three in one as the three of us (me, James and Greg) pick our 5 favorite things in a certain category it's as simple as that.

To kick things off we have a straight forward one in the form of the best games of all time and below we have Greg's picks.

Oh yeah just one other thing these top 5's will not be in any order just to make it a little easier.

Timesplitters 2
I'm a huge fan of FPS game but my enjoyment had to start off somewhere and it couldn't of started off in better company.
To say Timesplitters 2 is a great game gives it a little injustices this is not a great game it's a brilliant game, never before had a game in my eyes mixed the humor and extreme amount of content in one enjoyable package as well as TS2 did.
So that is why it makes my list.

Hog's of War
I had to choose a game that not very many people knew about and it's a great shame that they don't know Hogs of War as it took the best elements from a fantastic game in the shape of worms and replaced the worms with pigs.
Oh yeah it also had a fantastic range of weapons and it's level of graphical detail showed how a 3d war game should be made unlike when Worms went into 3d but the less said about that game the better.

Fallout 3
This generation of games have produced some memorable moments however this game has so many stand out moments that it shows other games up.
By starting off with a claustrophobic feel the developers were just slowly leading us on to what we were going to experience and that was one of the most vast and eye opening games i have ever played.
Never I've i had so much freedom to do what i wanted to do and how i wanted to do it and by doing this in a way that was easily accessible just goes to show you that this is a ultimate game.

Conflict Desert Storm 2
A bit of a weird choice this as i know a lot of people didn't like this game however it did introduce me to a element that would be used in future games thus making it a shoe in for my top 5 list.
The element I'm talking about is co-op as never before had i seen co-op done in the way this game achieved, me and a friend would spend hours on this game tackling the mission in so many different and unique way that it would cancel out all of the negative issues and make the positive ones shine through.
I know it's not a perfect game but a game doesn't have to be perfect for it to be enjoyable and this is one of those games.

Metal Gear Solid (PS1)
I remember back in the days of the PS1 there was a lack of any big hitter games then along came MGS and it proved once and for all that the PS1 wasn't a toy it was something that was about to change the way people see video games.
Now i know that it's a bit silly to say that one game achieved this but MGS was that big never before had a game blended movies and video games together so well thus making it feel like nothing i had ever played.
Coupled together with some of the best graphics and some of the most unique features (stealth, amazing boss battles) of the time you knew you had a winner and Hideo Kojima had one hell of a big winner here.

Well that's it for Greg's picks i will post up James choices tomorrow and mine will go up on Monday.